When I started this journey several years ago the reality was that I would have lost the one who means everything to me by now. Through her dna and her faith we still have her and that is a good thing. People have this notion of what a caregiver is and what they are not. The thing is the what many would call a traditional caregiving situation in many ways is based on a false concept. In a culture in which families are so spread out those traditional concepts just fade away.
The things I miss are the small stuff and not the big stuff. I can deal with the big stuff all day long but life for me is spent mostly alone. I wake up each day wondering if this is the day that this all blows up and it will! As a caregiver loneliness is a constant companion. You put on the public face and move on but here is a fact that many in my situation face.
When that horrible day comes it will be just me and our pet and that’s it. That may come as a surprise but it is very common in today’s world. Sure it’s a scary thought but all those people who said they would never leave us bailed out a long time ago. I knew it would happen to some degree but I never thought it would be this bad. I can’t recall the last time I actually met someone for lunch and the like. It just doesn’t happen. One of the things that can get tricky is dealing with the opposite sex. As humans we have needs ( get your mind out of the gutter) that are natural and are part of the human experience. Many of those things simply go away whether you like it or not.
Being a caregiver is a grind and that isn’t whining about it is just a fact. I think caregivers only fool themselves by believing they are not paying a price for what they are dealing with because we all are and that won’t until that horrible day happens.